Posts Tagged ‘Lady Gaga’

Who’s getting trashed these days?  Let’s begin with Malcolm Forbes, whose publication is in decline.  The tell-all book is by former editor Stewart Pinkerton and titled, “The Fall of the House of Forbes.”  David Evanier has penned a tome with dirty dish about crooner Tony Bennett - “All the Things You Are: The Life of Tony Bennett.”  Steven Spielberg is getting flak over his taping a message seen at a Bar Mitzvah on the grounds of the Auschwitz concentration camp.  Doctors, who lay off to play golf and get a healthy day in the office. Lindsay Lohan, who’s come up with a hundred new ways to become a burden to her family. The woman in the elevator at Plaza-Frontenac, who told her friend, “I’ve got a new pill and it has nothing but side-effects.” Bernard Madoff, whom people love to hate in installments – they’ll last longer. The somewhat drunk reporter, who called the newspaper. “City desk,” voiced a receptionist to which the reporter asked, “Which drawer?” Criminal “Whitey” Bulger, who should go home now that his cage is cleaned. Newt Gingrich, who never exaggerates about his accomplishments but tries his best.  John Edwards, who learned from his mistakes, but he should’ve studied more for the test. Lady Gaga, who has Van Gogh’s ear for comedy.They won’t say that former president of Egypt Hosni Murbarak is rotten, but they get the sinking feeling that Hitler didn’t die in that bunker. Every time Joan Rivers wants to express herself, some people suggest UPS. Finally, there’s Tom Cruise and to him, bubble-gum cards are part of the Great Books series.

From May, 2010 to May 2011 the leading box office winners in pre-tax revenue were: U2 who took home $195 million and $700 million from the international tour; Elton John brought to his table $100 million; Lady Gaga earned $90 million and Michael Buble scored with $70 million. . .It’s now necessary to send a “get well” card to Rick Desloge, the Business Journal scribe and KMOX broadcaster, who is ailing and undergoing treatment at Siteman Cancer Center. . Rose and Paul Gabrielle, who once owned Augustino’s in Chesterfield Valley, are interested in buying the shuttered Mihalis Chophouse & Bar on McCausland. . . The Missouri Press Association has commissioned a documentary film about the dedicated work of The Joplin Globe’s staff covering the May 22 tornado and aftermath.  One-third of the paper’s staff lost their homes and its page designer was killed.  Still, the staff continues to toil as the one-month anniversary looms.  The inspirational story of community journalism serving a community was green-lighted by the Missouri Press Association board, led by exec director Doug Crews. It is co-produced by Scott Charton, retired Associated Press roving correspondent now running Charton Communications in Columbia and Beth Pike and Steve Hudnell of Orr Street Studios in Columbia.

John Imo, heir to the Imo’s Pizza chain, was also on hand and boasted about the ingredients used in the pizzas turned out by the firm’s 92 stores in Missouri and Illinois.  “Other pizza makers use copycat provel cheese, but we use the original Hoffman provel,” he said. He noted that some of the stores are franchised requiring a fee of $25,000.  Former broadcaster-turned president of the Centric Group JimTheiss, described the firm as a holding company of Enterprise.  “We manufacture the Swiss Army products and even sell to prison stores,” said Theiss. A sight to behold:  three volunteers, geared up as Lady Gaga (Heather King); Betty Boop (Brittany Johnson) and Audrey Hepburn (Amber Ponder). While Cardwell’s server Joshua Mefford cozied up to St. Louis 6th ward alderwoman Kacie Starr Triplett, the columnist was haunted by the refrain, “Into the night go one and all,” and it was onward to join Genya and Jim Human along with Steve Anstey at Chez Leon, where exec chef Marcel Keravel bowed there. He and his wife, Monique, may best be remembered as owners of the famed Cafe de France.

ST. LOUIS CRISIS NURSERY CELEB WAITRESSES & WAITERS NIGHT

The columnist has made hundreds of New Year’s resolutions over the years – for himself and on behalf of many of you.  Some have taken: some have not.  For himself, the columnist vows better attention to health; more acceptance of the limits of medicine; greater patience with the pace of healing; and a more heartfelt gratitude to doctors, nurses, billing clerks, insurance companies, and (especially) to well-wishers.  He also vows greater attention to correct spelling, accurate timing, complete quoting, standard punctuation, organized note-taking, credible attribution, flattering photography, and graceful corrections.  Of course, that is an annual resolution, made with little real intention of doing anything about the habits of a lifetime gossipist. On your behalf, the columnist attributes (with no foundation and with relatively little malice) the following fantasy resolutions:

• From President Barack Obama: I’ll do my Christmas vacation next year with Claire, Joe, and their family in St. Louis, as long as Claire promises not to Tweet about it and Joe pays for the Pi.
• From Governor Jay Nixon:  I’ll ask Peter Kinder, who practically lives there, to tell Georganne the best places to eat, shop, and stay in St. Louis.
• From Archbishop Robert Carlson:  I’ll make more good news with Catholic Charities than bad.
• From SLU president the Rev. Larry Biondi:  I’ll commission a statue of a naked Rick Majerus for Bannister House if the Billikens make the NCAA Tournament.
• From Sen. Kit Bond:  I’ll use my final year to find jobs for all my staff.
• From County Executive Charlie Dooley:  I’ll ask the nice Greg Boyce for a couple of lumps of clean coal to put into a certain former staffer’s Christmas stocking.
• From Mayor Francis Slay:  I’ll give a Key to the City to Lady GaGa.
• From KMOV GM Alan Cohen:  I’ll do infomercials 24/7.
• From “Donnybrook” founder Martin Duggan:  I’ll start a blog. What’s a blog?
• From Emerson CEO David Farr and celebrated attorney Linda Martinez:  We had no idea we were named “man and woman of the year” by the Variety Club until we read it in Berger’s column. We hope he’ll be seated with us at the April 24th dinner.
• From Congressman Lacy Clay:  I’ll check “finally single”  on my Census form next year.
• From former GOP consultant Rod Jetton: I’ll use the hot air
• From the Robin  Carnahan campaign to fill a bouquet of green balloons.
• From Gateway Foundation donor M. Peter Fischer:  I think I’ll do another two blocks.
• From Build-A-Bear boss Maxine Clark:  I’ll stuff the first marketing person who suggests a children’s video on national health care reform, immigration, or gun control.
• From former Engineered Air’s Mike Shanahan:  Since that fancy country club in Naples, Fla., has blackballed me and sent me a check that bounced, I think I’ll remain at Old Warson.
• From the St. Louis Beacon’s Bob Duffy:  We now have our own space in the KETC-TV offices and hope we’ll open an Illinois bureau in Pontoon Beach.
• From television reporter Alex Fees:  Maybe I can get Donna Wilkinson to follow Steve Schankman on my “Conversations with. . .” in January on HEC-TV – if her stockings aren’t falling.
• From Congressman Russ Carnahan:  I’ll use my frequent flier miles to send mouthy Ed Martin on a long trip to country without the Internet.
• From Blues owner Dave Checketts:  I’ll play Ed Goltermann in goal for home games.
• From Gerard Craft:  I’ll open a Niche on every corner.
• From WashU chancellor Mark Wrighton:  I’ll get that Top 10 ranking back.
• From Chief Tim Fitch:  I’ll find a new badge for Floyd Warmann.
• From KSDK GM Lynn Beall:  I’ll retire or replace any face viewers might conceivably recognize.
• From Rams owner Chip Rosenbloom:  I’ll fire the coach if he blows our number one draft choice by actually winning another game.
• From Bob Baer:  I’ll ride the last Metro bus to Chesterfield if the County tax campaign fails in April.
• From would-be Rams owner Rush Limbaugh:  I’ll buy the Arch Rival Roller Girls instead.
• From north St. Louis developer Paul McKee:  I’ll mow all my yards and rake yours too.
• From entrepreneurs Mike and Steve Roberts: We’ll suggest changing the name of St. Louis City to Roberts St. Louis City.
• From Symphony music director David Robertson:  I’ll buy KFUO and program it with hip-hop, uh. . .classical music.
• From Cardinals president Bill DeWitt III:  I’ll change the name of Ballpark Village to Holliday Haven.
• From the Loop’s Joe Edwards:  I’ll open a successful venue on the actual Moon.
• From Lee CEO Mary Junck:  I’ll improve morale by signing a good contract with the Newspaper Guild.
• From AmerenUe officials:  I’ll use the phrase “a warm holiday glow” in our next filing with the Public Service Commission to soften them up on a nuclear power rate increase.
• From Art Museum honcho Brent Benjamin:  I’ll expand.
• From AB Inbev boss Carlos Britto: I’ll find out if Clydesdales go better with a little lime.
• From grocer Greg Dierberg:  I’ll open the most popular grocery in a decade and call it. . .Culinaria Too.
• From the Caseyville and Collinsville police:  Next time we hope we’ll get it right. (At Teezers Bar in Collinsville, a guy walked in with a silver handgun over the holidays and fired off a few rounds and marched out.  Police began looking for a 70 year-old man known to them and after much searching, they decided that the gunman they really needed to look for had the same name but was just 52.  Then, the Caseyville police gave their Collinsville counterparts an entirely different suspect’s name. The guy, who allegedly committed the explosive act, was none of the above: he had been hiding out all that time at Jessi’s Hideout in Collinsville.)
• From restaurateur Sam Kacar: I hope to open a third Trattoria Branica in Chesterfield Valley by mid-January and then focus on a fourth in the CWE or Webster Groves.
• From former airport director Dick Hrabko: I’m going to get those slots installed at the Spirit of St. Louis Airport.
• From Wind Capital exec Tom Carnahan:  I’ll use the hot air
• From the Roy Blunt campaign to generate electricity.
• From uber-flack Joan Quicksilver:  I’ll nominate Jerry Berger as Media Person of the Year.
• From affable CVC’s Kitty Ratcliffe:  I resolve I’ll ask for another convention center. (The woman has garnered kudos for signing such major confabs as the Church of God in Christ, that brought 40,000 here and has inked its convention for St. Louis in 2011 and 2012 – away From Memphis.
• From all of this column’s many sources: We’ll not turn a blind eye to any item that might amuse St. Louis in Jerry Berger’s website.

Caveat lector and Happy New Year!

Rev. Fred Phelps, the Kansas City pastor who has picketed funerals of soldiers to draw attention to his wacky theology, has selected a new target and a new battleground.  Phelps and his micro-congregation have announced plans to turn up as scheduled at the Jan. 7 performance of pants-impaired Lady Gaga at the Fox Theatre.  A press release from the rev. denounces Lady for being a “hussy”  and for “seducing a generation.”  A national pop-culture website, www.popeater,com drew this comment from buttoned-down and gay-friendly mayor Francis Slay: “I respect his right to protest, but this instance seems more like pop music criticism than a political protest.  I hope her fans have fun and spend lots of money here.  Other than that, there’s ‘Nothing Else I Can Say (eh eh).”   – an amusing nod, notes the popeater.com writer, to Lady Gaga’s song, ‘Eh, Eh (“Nothing Else I Can Say).”  But will hizzoner, who once famously refused to honor an alleged wife-batterer like Ike Turner, turn up for Lady Gaga’s show?…  Mayor Slay was on a roll with a visit by U.S. Commerce Secretary Gary Locke, who had planned to fork over a $15 million grant to allow the city to replace the South Dock at the Municipal River Terminal, which the mayor said will also preserve jobs.  In the lobby fast-talking PR types were politely pushing TV camera crews to raise up their camera stands since Locke is much shorter than Slay. Slay then gave Locke a tour through the inner sanctum and rattled off a litany of White House visitors with grant monies

NEWSOME TWOSOME: Charlie Gitto’s downtown stop was where Dani Wehmer was feted on her birthday at a party tossed by her soulmate Ricky Dicker of Wedge Tire fame. Not only was she presented an engagement ring but also a proposal for marriage. She accepted. A September marriage is now in the works. . . Barrister Gentry Sayad is clocking out at Armstron Teasdale to head up the Asia office of Minneapolis-based Fredrikson Baron. His office will be in Shanghai.

HAPPY HOLLYDAYS: Howard Hayes, the St. Louis Land Reutilization Authority (LRA) chairman, said that about 200 people each year buy city property on which to build. “We’re rebuilding one block at a time,” he said. “The city owns about 8,000 acres.” Hayes was among the party-goers at the Democrats’ holiday frolic at the IBEW hall in south city. As far as Paul McKee‘s plan in north St. Louis, Hayes opined, “If you don’t like his plan, where’s yours?” County Exec Charlie Dooley sang “My Girl” for fellow-Dems, when not glad-handing the folks in the crowd that included state reps Jake Zimmerman, Mike Corcoran, Jack Hummel, Michele Kratky and Sue Schoemehl.  County council members celebrating were Babara Fraser and Kathleen Kelly Burkett and U. City mayor Joe Adams, St. Louis city aldermen Stephen Gregali and Jennifer Florida, Hazelwood mayor Matt Robinson, Missouri state sen. Joe Keavney collector of revenue Gregg Daly and Florissant councilman Keith Schildroth, a 2010 candidate for the 76th Dist. in the Missouri House. “My strength as a councilman has been my work by old-school politics,” said Schildroth. “I go to residences and talk to the people.”  Others in the crowd were Jeannie King, Mickey McTague, Mary Elizabeth Dorsey, Doug Clemens, Sean Weller, Marianne Solari, Byron DeLear, John Gwaltney, Rhoda Womack and Eileen and Leo McGeoghegan.  One of the most sought after figures there was marketing baron David Woodruff of Blue Pear media and political campaigns. His client list consists of among others: Mayor Tommy Sowers (Rolla) for Congress (8th Dist.); Joe Adams for state senate (14th Dist.); Rep. Michael Corcoran for state senate (24th Dist.); Marty Zuniga for the house (100th Dist.) of Oakville. Woodruff also does consulting and fundraising for St. Louis Ald. Shane Cohn, Sue Schoemehl and Michele Kratky.

FURTHERMORE: St. Louis county police commish Greg Sansone – steady as he goes – with Elisabeth Ottolini of cutsie Ceylavie Catering in Chesterfield, spotted over lunch at Annie Gunn’s. . . Don’t stop Adriana Fazio – too busy making stuffed sirloin meatloaf and pistachio cake at her Adriana’s on The Hill. . . After about a year, Mike Fiala continues to eye the former Coco’s space on Lindbergh Boulevard for another Talayna’s. . .Yesteryear Balaban’s chef David Timney is ditto-ing at Mangia Italiano, where pals say he’s providing pasta for Dierbergs and Straub’s. . .The SLUTS (St. Louis Urban Traders) may just end the year with twinkie rewards.  SLUTS’ membership is limited to gay men. . . Pediatric ENT specialist Dr. James Forsen and his wife, Janis, are beaming with word that their daughter, Libby Forsen, was chosen as a junior maid at the Veiled Prophet Ball. . . Plaudits for Geile-Leon Marketing and John O’Connor, who support Project Restore on a pro-bono basis.  The Edwadsville, Ill.,-based agency has provided much-needed drinking water for the Ugandan villages of  Namulonge, Buso and Kasambia for use this winter.  The Project Restore team has traveled to Uganda this month to install new rain harvesting systems to holding tanks. . .

BOTTOMING OUT: Bride to husband: “The best things I cook are meat loaf and peach cobbler.”  Husband to bride: “Which one is this?”

The columnist doesn’t have to leave his computer for some juicy bits . . . Promoters may have pulled the plug on Kanye West‘s scheduled Dec. 4 appearance here with the popular – but musically challenged — Lady Gaga, but that hasn’t, says plastic surgeon Carlos Farias, kept West out of St. Louis. Farias reports (via Facebook, of course) that he sat four rows away from KW on a St. Louis-bound airliner last week. Farias was on his way back from a vacation in Milan; West’s intentions were unknown, except perhaps to traveling companion (and on-again, off-again gal pal) Amber Rose . . . Ritz-Carlton Hotel snitches vow they recently ran into General Pervez Musharaff, former prez of Pakistan, and one of the hotel staffers followed him into the cigar club there. Musharaff is currently pursuing a career on the lucrative international lecture circuit, touting a vision for his country called “Enlightened Moderation.” He is represented by the Harry Walker Agency of New York . . . At a recent meeting of the Democratic National Committee (in Austin, Texas), our town’s Demo party chief Brian Wahby (@bwahby) was elected as Missouri’s at -large member. His political promotion to the upper echelon came, he says, with the blessing of Missouri’s twitterer-in-chief Sen. Claire McCaskill (@clairecmc) and the encouragement of a resident in the White House . According to his tweets, Mayor Francis Slay (@mayorslay) has just jetted back from several days in Seattle, where he and 60 other mayors were sorting through local environmental policies . . . Delicious Monarch well-deserves its accolades (including numerous “Best Restaurant” mentions), but the Maplewood eatery seems embarrassed (or confused) by its address. On Saturday night, its social media marketing was directing potential diners to “the CWE” – a St. Louis neighborhood several miles (and a couple of zip code digits) away from Manchester and Sutton . The sacrosanct St. Louis Country Club will hold its “Monte Carlo Revisited” gambol on Nov. 7, featuring dinner and gambling. Call the cops?